forgiveness belongs to the one who ask

how can you forgive somebody and they are to stupid to apologize…….

I will forgive even though my heart hurts
I’m not looking for a gimmick here I just want to part her
But instead if he is a real man an I consider him a true friend
Then why should I tie his hands by holding up his forgiveness

I just want to be me
Maybe I could live in peace
Even if there is very little harmony
Peace of mind is the only thing that’s calming me

If I just let go I’m hoping I can free fall
And I hope that you won’t just be thrown into a free for all
My forgiveness is imperative
It may not mean much to you
But I really was kinda hoping that God would start touching you

I will forgive even though you smashed my feeling
My whole heart obliterated
Maybe I should think about why I am so agrevated
Maybe it is just me
I could be a failure
Or I could be running out of ways to tell her….

Maybe her self esteem is low
The only way she can bring it up is by acting like a….
I’m not sure I just want to keep my thoughts pure
I’m on the brink of agony and I do not feel secure
But if the day passes and the sun continues shining
Then I will forgive you and you wont have to remind me

In my forgiveness please don’t approach me soon
Give me a minute the passing of a new moon
And when you do come to me do it with some apprehension
You so bent on talking please just listen

And the fact is I don’t know the words to say
The fact of the matter I wish you would just go away
But since I’m practicing forgiveness let me give this another try
I’m going to take a few more days so I can just go somewhere and cry

Finally I pull myself together and I’m all wound up
Like a lentball on a sweater
I would forgive her
But she will kill you if you let her

And the more I think about it she never asked to be forgiven
She wants to be dirty as a rag
So why am I sad
I suppose I could just let her go
Seasons always change
The colors let us know

tuesday

i’m just going to put it out there you can mess it up for yourself…..

 

tuesday

One day I’m going to look back on this day that seemed to last so long

And I’m going to know that I was able to act so strong

Really I was able to just pray to God and hold on

An to tell the truth for everything that I been thru

Today is just a Tuesday

Let me take you back to when similac had me bending over looking sideways

Like I need to just run out the store with a whole case

When I barely got enough money to buy eight ounces

Now I’m trying to figure out how to finance eight houses

And that was just last Tuesday 

 

You don’t hear me but if you could visualize the memory

So much drama I’m a baby father hit a pause like a comma

 I was doing my best just trying not to go crazy

Between moms my ex and my daughter

If it wasn’t for iris and this new baby and wanting so bad to be a good father

I would have went to the covers and just got lazy stayed

 In my bed until the new order

Slept thru the day and woke up in a paradise

I wasn’t being proactive and things were not looking right
and that was like last night

Because today I work under the shadow of a new light

Discernment and insight from Sunday to Monday
and today is a Tuesday

 

The day when Dave had to pay dues

Walked miles when the car would break down

I use to get so mad that my anger would fuel me

I learn a lesson because that same anger would fool me

But instead of getting caught up in some ole whoola foolery

I change my mind set

And if i never make a rhyme step

Step in time yet

my mind went back to when my regrets would pile up

Like dirty clothes

I do suppose that I could come up with an outlet

For which I chose not to with hold the old

Let go of the cold like the April wind that blows

Forgive and forget the old anger is the wind that blows

Out the lamp of the mind

So I’m on my grind till next Tuesday

i love poetry (Yeah I write whatever)

Can I get a chance to tell my side of the the story
Fight for the fame press for glory
I just want to make a mention
Add some dimension
Get my 20 seconds
Pay me some attention

I’m fallen by the wayside you could say thru the cracks
I’m gunning for the papers but they not coming back
So much for the Pulitzer I want the highest honor
But there is no room for me I’m beyond a goner
I’m so far out the loop I’m off the charts
I don’t even qualify for a Pulitzer fart
I guess I can forget about the prize
But I’m still focus never dim
I tried to be clever

I’m so hip hop
Yeah I write whatever

What if I could get that nobel peace deal
Or a source magazine honorable mention
That would push my poetry off the planet
Into a new dimension
I could go from rubbing sleepy eyes
To nightly recognition
I bet I could read a poem for Russel Simmons
And to tell the truth I’m just trying to keep my focus
Like a laser
I don’t want to get my 15 minutes of fame for being tasered

Even though I seem so dedicated
I could write 24 hours a day for a week and then spend the same
Amount of time separated
From my pen, pad or laptop

And lately I don’t write more than one page before I stop

Putting on the New Personality

Putting on the New Personality

I’m trying to make a change be a new man
But the old me wants to hold me
I try to change I get hit with the flying tackle
Its like my legs are shackled
And I just feel like im in an outdoor prison
Because I can see the light
In fact I can see the life that I want
But I just can’t seem to attain
And I keep wracking my brain
I’m trying to change but the old me is deeply ingrained
Like a bad stain
A grape stain
A mud stain
A blood stain
The kind stain that you can scrub
And the remnant will always be seen
An I guess I’m not clean

But still I just want to be the new me
I’m battling to gain the new personality
It’s almost like a fantasy
I just feel like I’m failing
And I try to take in the accurate knowledge
And make and application
But every day is like the ground hog day
I just feel like I’m stuck in a comedy
And its just not funny
Because the people around me want to see new money
And I’m so decrepit
With every event I tried to learn a lesson
But I repeat the same mistakes
And I just want to know what does it take

Is this a test of faith
Cause I’m out on a limb
Really I trust God and I know Christ
But someday’s I just feel like I can’t get write
And if you ever feel this way
Then say it with me
Oh lord would you come and get me
Take me away
I mean off the planet
Some days I just feel like a captive stranded…

Ok
Just give me peace
You could take the breath of life
Right off me
I’m in a motion
I can feel the minutes
I’m not sure that I will survive til dinner

I am hanging in there
I’m trying my hardest
I beat the case
And I faced down the charges
Now this is my life and I’m taking control
And if you try to grab me you cant take a hold
I’m off the planet I’m off my place
Some days I feel like I landed on my face
My strategy is failing
How can I be the man
I want to be the new man
I want to be a man
I just want God to take the burden off my hands

And then with the trouble that I have an had
I think about my dad
And then I know why some days he seemed so very mad
And I just feel challenged trying to keep a balance
And I’m hoping to God not to bury my talent
I’m going to take a chance
And step out on faith
Let me do it in your time
I feel like I could wait
But something tells me I had better go now
And im working on my skill so I can get the know how
And if i need instruction please show me how
I’m going now in fact I’m gone
And I hope what I have said
Might help you carry on

I am a poet so I could just write away the stress

somebody ever stress you out so bad that you can’t do your job, your normal function you just feel like depressed and angry and more mad at yourself for letting this sucka put you in this position

hear feel me if i could work my dream job i would work as an apprentice with jesse james let him teach me how to cut and shape metal build cars and motorcyles

then i would build bikes and cars and just cut the tops off just cause i could and if anybody had even an iotem to say about it i would tell them to eat a rock

sorry i went off on a tanget but pick this up i’m not on some violence tip but im so mad if i had a brick i would definitely….here check this out i wish i had a foam brick then i could have hit him in the face and he wouldn’t really be hurt i could have got a good laugh out of the deal…

sorry that was me on my confused soapbox here is the poem i promise it will make your day and take away some of your stress…

put the darn brick down sheesh!

I’m pissed

 Sometimes the only way to change minds is to be so forward so aggressive
So passionate so drastic so caustic so weapon wielding fierce so loud
That they cant help but hear us

 Then there is the chance that these guys that we throw rocks at from the nosebleed seats
Really are not worth our effort
 I’m going to buy a stadium big as the roman theater

Forgive me mom but I’m sick of being held down by the neck

 These suckas got to show me some respect or I’m going to burn the building down
And that’s not a threat that’s me being repressed
I’m stressed
And I cant see a way out of this mess

 I’m a poet
 So here I’m going to add flowers
Here is a field full of Iris in the early dawn
Dew drops on her back smell like ripe pear nectar
 An my chest feels like its caving in and the only way to save it then
 Is to relieve the pressure like a cool autum breeze
Write when the air turns brisk and the evening comes

But the darkness has yet to arrive
And the kids play in the leaves
And I’m trying to paint a picture but I never been an artist
 Give me the chance to describe the yellows and the blues
And the light of the shade and the darkness of the rain
But its so refreshing it is God’s blessing
In the form of a life lesson
And I am is and  was
but I’m not so let the stress cook

In the piping hot boiling pot
 And I’ll have  a stew a soup for the soul
A moment to lie awake in the mold of life
And it can be molded into whatever you like
And I just want the hills and the bridge and the park

So I will get the hills and the bridge and the park

I am after all
I am a poet so I could just write away the stress
And let them know in the quiet of words written
That they have once again been belligerently smitten

pick a colour (I stopped listening)

Nothing like trying to talk to somebody that won’t listen……
Every time they open there mouth you begin to see visions
Stark raving mad they come out the kitchen
Jumped out the rubber room just to stand on a soapbox
This is just not the time or the place
And when you try to explain the explanation is get out my face
Or you could ask a pointed question
and they answer without even allowing for digestion
the words so sour you can taste them in your ears
your replies are limited to a frustrated two step
and you just wish the person would run out of breath
keel over, drop back, recind, retreat back off let it go
but no
they have something to say

and I can promise you will never hear
the end of it
and how can you be lovers

 when the words are so caustic
they
burn holes in your soul
holes in your brain
holes in your heart
just to the point where you want to take back your part
just say there!
Now you are free you have freedom of speech
And I am not a target so fire your furious words
At somebody else the mailman a janitor a roadworker
A store clerk the lady at the Laundromat anybody but
Me
Cause I’m am literally sick and tired of hearing it
My ears can’t take it my legs and feet can’t stand it
My heart is broken and destroyed
That’s what you were trying for
Well that’s what I was dying for
And I got it and you gave it to me
So I’m just not listening anymore
Call me what you want but I can’t take it
And if I was listening
you can believe
That you and me wouldn’t make it

thank you for waiting

the boi got sick for a minute and the brain body and soul shut down, fortunately for me when i got well (and it has been a month now) i had a whole host of poems in my head just waiting for the great escape here is a poem i’m calling

I appreciate you thanks for stopping by

So you want to be true to yourself
And you just know how easy it would be to just lose yourself in these words

Till you find out who reads these words

And if you just get one comment
One somebody that sais they read and didn’t vomit

They found what you had to say relevant

And you kept them from passing off all poetry as just
Trash
It’s not just trash

 So i’m thankful that I could get you to spend sometime with me

Because I had to spend some time with me to get you to see
That I appreciate you so much

 And I know you think that I’m so out of touch

But I’m not

And I have an opinion as to whether the new Eminem album will be hot
An I had some thoughts about whether sprite is really refreshing

But I can’t just say what I want to

Two words can come back to haunt you
And in your dreams two words can taunt you

And in the day time the same two words can stand before you

And no matter what they say those two words can get under your skin
 So if I was ever appreciative I just want to be that again

And if you ever read one of my poems

I just want you to want to read it again
And if it looks like I’m trying
Believe me when I tell you I’m trying again

 And I’m doing this because I’m a champ
And I was planning for the rematch before my face hit the mat
Before I laced up these gloves I was prepared to win
And before I stepped into the ring I was scared to win

 Now I’m back and the second time is so much different
The crowd is chanting my name and I’m just listening
I don’t even have on vasiline and my face is just glistening
I’m thinking like Mayweather, I will never miss again

In fact I feel like the Governor of Michigan

I’m at the top of the game but only if you are listening